“I can’t believe I’m home!” I say, looking out of the bus window. “And with you guys, this is so cool.” I jump out of my seat. I am so excited, I get to see my family and friends for the first time in a month and a half. I have never stayed away this long. The bus parks at Nissan Pavilion and we take a limousine to my family’s townhouse. As soon as we pull up, I jump out and run up the stairs. I swing the door open and shout “Honey, I’m home!” My mother, brothers, sister, and grandparents rush out of the kitchen. I yelp, and hug all of them. I start going off on how much I missed them, when I realize the guys standing in the doorway. “Oh, I’m sorry. This is my mom, my Gramma, Grampa, my sister, Jenny, and my older brother Jess, and younger brother Billy. Everybody who doesn’t know, which wouldn’t include Jen, because she knows,” I give her a sly grin, “this is Howie, Kevin, Nick, Brian, and AJ.” Everyone shake hands and says hellos. As soon as everyone is aquainted, my mom ushers everyone into the living room. “So, Jenny here is a BSB fan. She’s the one with the hots for Brian.” She glares at me and blushes. “No, I’m kidding, but she is a fan, also. She actually introduced me to you.” “Yes, I did. I had to wean her away from oldies and musical soundtracks with something.” She smiles at them as I jump up. “Ok, I’m going to leave you to fend for yourself. You guys,? motioning to my family, “be nice. Jen, protect them.” I whisper something in my mother’s ear and she nods. I bound into the kitchen and pick up the phone. I call Megghan and tell her to call up the group and get them over her. I asked her to call Kiran, my best-best friend, since the 4th grade and tell her to get her butt over here pronto. I walk back into the living room to find Nick, Billy, and Brian playing Sega, Jenny, and AJ looking through a photo album, and Howie, Kevin, Jess, and my grandfather discussing politics. While, my mom and Gramma sit back and watch their surroundings. I sit down next to Jen and AJ, to find out they are looking through my scrapbook. “Oh geez, Jen, you have to show him this don’t you?” “He asked. He said he wanted something for blackmail.” I punch AJ playfully in the stomach, and he keels over as if Mike Tyson had hit him. I hear the doorbell ring, “Oh, you!” I cry as I jump up and run for the door. “Meggie! I grab her wrist before she says anything and drag her to the living room. “Meggo, this is Howie, Kevin, Brian, Nick, and AJ.” “Hi.” Megghan says, shyly. She never was as outgoing as I was, but that’s cool. The doorbell rings, again, so I run back. Standing there is Missy, and Lysa. “Tanya!” They yell in unison. We hug and I lead them in. “Ok, Missy and Lysa-” I am interrupted by a knock on the door. “Introduce yourselves.” For the next 10 minutes, I run back and forth between the living room and front door., opening the door and introducing. As soon as the majority has arrived, my grandmother shoos us out onto the deck to have a bar-b-que. Jess and Kevin take charge of the grill, while my mother, sister, and grandmother make trips between the kitchen and deck, returning with various side dishes and meats, of course veggie burgers for the select vegetarians of the group. Each and every available chair and deck space is occupied by someone. I look around, I smile to myself, the closest people to me, minus my father, who was away on a business trip, are seated around me. How good can life get? We sit and eat, while having a very animated conversation. I realize Nick seems to be scooting away from me. When I turn, I see he isn’t just scooting away form me, he is moving closer and closer to Katie. They are, obviously, flirting. I have this horrible, drowning feeling wash over my body. I makes me want to stop Nick from talking to her. No, I can’t do that, Katie is my friend. I’m jealous of her. Why, Kevin, Brian, Howie, and especially AJ, are flirting with my friends. Why am I jealous of Katie? Chill out Tanya, I try to calm myself. I jump up quickly, startling the group. Katie and Nick, not even noticing, keep fawning over each other. “I’m...I’ve got to go use the restroom.” I scurry out. As soon as I close the sliding glass door the doorbell rings. Who could it be, I wonder. I open the door to find Kiran and my life long crush, Reed. “Kiran! Reed! Hi! What are you doing here?” I ask. “Well, Megg called me, and I needed a ride, so I called Reed. And here we are. Tada!” I smile broadly at them. Kiran and Reed live close to each other, but about an hour away from me. “I guess you’re here to meet the guys.” I assume. “Actually, Tanya, can we talk?” Reed asks. “Sure, Kir, let yourself back there, you know most everyone, have Missy introduce you.” “Ok.” She smiles at me, knowingly. I take a seat on the stairs and Reed joins me. “So, what’s up?” I ask. “Ok, this is going to be hard, so please, don’t interrupt.” I nod at him. “As you know, I’m going into my sophomore year at UVA in the fall. I wanted you to know, I’ve liked you for a long time and always wanted to ask you out, but never had the guts. But...” He takes a deep breath, and finishes what he has to say, “I met someone. We’re engaged to be married when we graduate.” I give him a blank stare. What am I supposed to say? The one guy I wanted my entire life is getting married. I look at him and smile, it is weak, but it is a smile. “Congratulations. I’m sure she’s a great girl. I’m happy for you.” I try so hard to hold back my tears. “Thanks, I guess I should go, I’ll talk to you later, ok?” He says, getting up and brushing himself off. “Bye.” He turns and walks out the door, shutting the door quietly. I burst out into tears, covering my face with my hands. My sobs rack my entire body, I am so disappointed. Kiran walks in. “Tanya.” She cries, running over to me. “What’s wrong?” “He’s getting married.” I choke out between sobs. “He’s what?!? He came here to tell you he’s getting married. The nerve!” She huffs. I hear the glass door open and see Nick stride in, followed by Katie. They see me, tear-stained face and all, Nick runs over to me and kneels beside me. “Tanya, are you all right?” He asks, taking my hand, and looking into my eyes. “Don’t. Don’t do that.” I fume. “Don’t act as if you care about me. When you asked me out, I thought I meant something to you. But as soon as I decline, you run to her and flirt as if nothing happened. Just don’t.” I push past Nick, Kiran, and Katie, and run down to my room. I throw myself onto my bed, and bury my head in the pillows. I cry until there is no more tears to be shed. I hear my door open and close. “Tanya,” it’s Brian, “what’s wrong? Talk to me.” I turn over and prop myself against my pillows, pulling my knees to my chest. “I can’t.” “Why?” “Because it’s too confusing.” “Try me.” I explain what had happened between Reed and I. “And when I saw Nick with Katie, I was jealous. I guess I was always jealous of Katie. She’s so pretty and funny, she always got the guy. While I was always the guy’s friend. It’s great, till you want someone to love you, ya know.” I take a deep breath trying to control my shaking voice. “I have too much going on to deal with my love life.” “You really like Nick, don’t you?” I look up at his face, void of any expression to show the way he feels. “I don’t know.” I answer, barely audible. “Well, when you do know, I want you to know I will be behind you one hundred percent. I think we, Kev, D, Alex and I only wanted a companion, you know. But, I realize if you and Frack are a couple, doesn’t mean you can’t be a companion to the rest of us. You and Nick are like my best friends, it would be selfish of me to not want you to be happy.” I smile and hug him. “That means so much to me. Thank you.” I say, softly. “But I don’t know if the others feel the same way you feel.” “Oh, I know they do.” He assures me. “How?” “Because we drew straws to see who would come down here. I drew the shortest.” “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” I ask, sincerely. “Well, I got a hug, I’d say good.” He smiles at me. “Hey, if he gets a hug, I get a hug.” Kevin exclaims striding into my room. “Me too!” AJ follows. “Don’t forget me!” Howie trails behind. Back upstairs, Nick is pacing in the kitchen. I was so stupid, he thinks, I can’t believe I did that. I love her so much, but there I go and blow it by flirting with Katie. He sits and the table and bangs his forehead with his palm, as I walk in. “Trying to get your brain cells working again?” I ask. “Yeah, something like that. Are you still mad at me?” “No, I wasn’t mad at you or Katie. I just had a lot happening and I wasn’t thinking straight. I’m sorry.” “Don’t be, it was my fault. I never should have flirted with her, I don’t know, bad habit, maybe.” I pull out the chair next to him a sit. “It wasn’t your fault. I was jealous of Katie, and then Reed came over and broke some bad news. You were sort of an bystander, that got the blame. I was mad and I...I...just...” I stumble over my words, not knowing what to say. “I’m not making any sense am I?” He smiles and shakes his head ‘no’. I push my hair out of my eyes in frustration. I open my mouth to say something but he interrupts. “You have beautiful eyes. They are so blue.” I look down, “Thank you.” I look back up at him. “Nick, is your offer still standing.” “Which offer?” He cocks his head to the side, his blonde hair falling over his eyes. “The one about you and me.” “You want to change your answer?” He looks at me, hopeful. I can’t speak, so I nod my head. He stares at me for a moment, then holds his hand out to me. I take it, and he stands, pulling up. He wraps his arms around me. He smells so nice, I think. When we let go of each other, he takes my hand and leads me back outside. As soon as we step outside, everyone is clapping, cheering, and yahooing. I feel my face get hot, and I look at Nick to see his face turn red. “They even blush together! How cute!” Kiran announces. I toss her a shut-up-or-I’m-going-to-kill-you look and my mouth spreads into a grin. Well, it is pretty funny. “Come, sit! Enjoy the merriment!” Sean exclaims. Nick and I pull two chairs and sit down. I notice Brian smiling at me, so I smile back. “What?” I mouth. “Nothing.” He mouths back. Two hours later, Megghan, Katie, Missy, Lysa, Jenny, and I are milling around backstage. “When do we get to go into the wings?” Jenny asks, impatient to see the show. “When I go onstage, right now there are too many people running around to let you guys back there.” I explain. She nods, knowingly. “Tanya, show time!” Gary, the stage manager informs me over the intercom. “Ok, half stage left, half stage right. Now, follow me.” I lead the way, directing each half where to go. I walk onstage and meet the Backstreet Fans. “Hello Virginia!” I shout. The sea of people scream back greetings. “I’m so glad to be home with all my family and friends! And they don’t know this, but my friends backstage were all apart of the cast of ‘Grease’, so I decided, we should do a little presentation for you, what do ya think?” I motion for my friends to come onstage, “Jen, you helped me choreograph this dance, you can do it too.” We huddle in center stage, I explain our mission. They nod and grin, ear to ear. We take our positions for the beginning of the ‘Grease’ finale, when the lights suddenly black out. “What the?” I act confused, all apart of the plan, of course. When the lights come back up, the Backstreet Boys are standing on top of the platforms, in black jeans, black leather jackets, with a “T” emblazoned on the back, and sunglasses. “Much better.” I comment. I hear Tim count the beats behind me. He starts with the drumming of “Born To Hand Jive” “Before I was born late one night, my Papa said everything’s all right.” Brian sings as Eugene, Rydell’s class geek. While he sings, the gals and I dance the ensemble parts and the other guys do the hand jive. The music changes. “We go together, like rama-lama-lama-da-ding-a-di-ding-dong!” The Boys walk down to join us on the lower stage. Nick takes my hands and dances with me, a little swing, a little rock and roll. By the time we finish, the entire crowd is singing along, and screaming at the top of their lungs. “Thank you!” I shout back, Nick, still, holding my hand. “I’m sorry I have to say this, but we don’t have enough time to have Q and A, but I hope this was good enough!” I motion for my friends to exit stage right. I say good bye to my sister and friends. “Jen, tell everyone I love them, ok?” “Yeah. You better make sure Brian stays single and available for me when he gets back.” “I’ll try.” I laugh. They early to be able to avoid the mob. I decide to get on the bus early, to clean up. “Hey Tanya.” Nick greets me as he steps on the bus. “Where are the others?” I ask, noticing they weren’t following him. “They need to get stuff together.” He explains, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me close. I tip my head back to see his smiling face. He lowers his head until our lips meet. We hold our first kiss for a few moments, until I jerk my head back. Nick looks at me, concerned. “Are you ok? Did I do something wrong?” “Yes, I mean, no...I mean...I’m not use to this. That was my first real kiss.” I explain, quietly. “Really?” His expression softens. I nod, and hear the door open. We separate, practically jumping to different sides of the room. “Hey you two. I figured this is where you were, Kaos, bailing on clean up, huh? AJ charges. “Who me?” Nick tries to act innocent, “Never!” Followed by AJ, is Kevin, Howie, and Brian. “Guess what? We get to stay at Tanya’s tonight!” Howie announces. “Really! I get to sleep in my own bed, cool!” I grin, ear to ear. When we arrive, I throw my backpack over my shoulder and lead the guys inside. “Hello again!” My mom greets me with a hug and kiss. “I set up a few makeshift beds in Jess’s room, he’s sleeping upstairs with Billy in the bunks. And a couple in Tanya’s room. I trust I can rely on you.” “I call first shower downstairs.” I claim. “There is another shower upstairs, if anyone wants to use it.” “Me!” Brian says before anyone else. After everyone has showered and said goodnight, we split and Kev, D, and Alex divided into my brother’s room, and Nick, Brian and I split to our room. “Wait right there.” I command them closing my door. I shed my robe and climbed into beg. “Ok, you can come in.” “I’ll be right back, bathroom.” Brian turns and walks down the hall. Nick chooses the make shift bed at the side of my bed, and sits cross-legged. He looks up at me, “You’re beautiful.” I look down, embarrassed, even compliments from my boyfriend embarrass me. Brian returns and climbs into the other make-shift bed at the end of mine. I turn out the light. “Goodnight Brian.” “Goodnight Tan.” “Goodnight Nick.” “Goodnight Goldie.” “Goodnight Brian.” “G’night Nick.” I crack up, that was so funny. Kind of like the Waltons Family. A few minutes later, Nick sits up and whispers in my ear, “Sweet dreams,” and kisses me on my forehead, then the tip of my nose. He gently places his lips over mine, sweetly. When we part I sigh, softly. “You two are the loudest kissers I have ever heard.” Brian announces. I grab my pillow and chuck it at him. “Ooof!” He grunts as the pillow knocks him in the head. “Oh, that’s it!” He throws it at Nick knocking him backwards. “Ow!” I laugh, gleefully, at them. Brian and Nick grab a pillow and swing it at me simotaniously. I fall backwards, laughing uncontrollably. “I don’t know what’s so funny.” I choke out between laughing fits. Nick and Brian find my laughing at nothing hysterical, so they join in, rolling on the floor, laughing hysterically. “What is so funny?” Howie pokes his head in my doorway. “Absolutely nothing.” Nick answers, egniting another fit. “You need help. Lots of help.” Howie turns and walks back down the hallway. I take a deep breath, “Ok, we have to calm down.” “Yeah.” Brian follows my lead, taking a deep breath. I look over at Nick, face twitching, trying to hold in laughter, eyes rolled up to the ceiling. I grab a pillow and shove my face into it, trying to conceal my giggles. By the time we calm down and lie down to go to sleep, my stomach aches from laughter. “G’night, again.”